Lust of the Swamp Witch: we’re bringing sexy bad
The best thing about Lust of the Swamp Witch is the name. It’s one of those titles that instantly (if the creators had a mind to take this road) sells books, movie tickets, T-shirts, whatever. A “Lust of the Swamp Witch” YouTube video would snap up a million hits in a week, guaranteed.
The plot has potential as well. An eccentric 30-ish woman sets up house in a swamp. She lures her teenage half-brother to her alligator-friendly abode for a retelling of the story of Odysseus and Circe the witch, to be followed by some alcohol-fueled carnal relations. Bizarre? Yes. Kicking the crap out of any plot you’re likely to see on television any night of the week? Also, yes.
Chilko Tivy, playing the Swamp Witch, Vera, can act. She moves. She swoons. She dances. She whispers and shouts and recoils and seduces. If this were a one-woman show, she might be able to pull it off.
Unfortunately, she’s not the only person on the stage.
In every young actor’s life, there comes a critical time when a curmudgeony critic comes along and tells them that they stink. The review is so awful, so famously unforgiving, that they may question whether it is worth it to continue to suffer the slings and arrows. The weak ones will stop acting. The better ones will work on their craft and ultimately share a gift with the world.
Nathaniel Hanula-James, playing the half-brother, is the actor that stinks. And I am that curmudgeony critic.
Hanula-James is an actor utterly without charisma, just barely able to say his lines while standing still. He breaks down the fourth wall constantly for no reason at all. He smiles, laughs and rolls his eyes at inappropriate times, choosing to become a member of the audience during Tivy’s many manic narratives, rather than playing off of her. The only consistent thing about his performance is a buzzing nasal whining voice that grates on your soul.
Instead of a frustrated rebellious teenager with testosterone coming out his ears and a chip firmly welded to his shoulder, the half-brother is a skinny annoying princess-brat. The character would clearly be just as happy getting mashed into the couch by a bearded leather fetishist as getting it on with his half-sister. We’re supposed to believe that the Circe character plotted and planned for four years to seduce this whiney, rail-thin kid she compares again and again to the conquering hero Odysseus? It doesn’t add up.
If you’re an obsessed fan of anything to do with Greek myths, give this show a try. Same goes if you need to see a real-life case study of what really bad acting looks like right next to a capable performance. Otherwise, give this one a pass.
Lust of the Swamp Woman is part of this year's Vancouver Fringe (and if the creators are quick and smart, youtube shortly). For more information on the Fringe version get swampy here.